Daily Living Archives - Page 48 of 74 - Mothering in the Middle

Love That Rings True

by Jenilyn Gilbert

I met my husband swing dancing in Grant Park in downtown Chicago when I was 38 years old. We dated for a couple of years and I was one month into my fortieth year when I walked down the aisle.

I recall the time before I met him; all the first dates, sadness over not having a life partner and feeling so left out and so behind my peers. I attended so many wedding showers and weddings that I never thought my turn would come. When I attended a friend’s second wedding, I thought ‘that’s it, this will never be me, now they’re starting to run two circles around me. I will never get married.’ Now that I’m two years into my marriage I just want to be pregnant. […]

101 Affirmations for Children

by Evelyn Lim

I compiled a list of affirmations for children, recently, from a wish to help mine with self-mastery and positive programming. As adults, many of our limiting thought patterns can be attributed to childhood conditioning or having unconsciously adopted negative societal beliefs. While we look for ways to help realign ourselves, how about starting with a better way forward in our children? […]

on loving a teenager

by Karen Maezen Miller

They love us in a different way.

I said that when someone asked what it was like to have a teenager.

I feel like we’ve lost a daughter.

My husband said that after a silent and inconsequential Sunday.

Just shut up.

I said that to her after a ride in the car yesterday.

And yet, there is love, so much love between us and it has gone nowhere! I am standing on the high bluff over death valley, infinite openness in all directions, stunned dumb in the emptiness, but I know the space before me is pure love. Pure love. Life grows here, even when we can’t see it. Refreshed in a cool night, fed by invisible rivulets. A whisper of sea sails five hundred miles across five mountain ranges, and the whisper is this.

They love us in a different way.

They love us in the space, the space that is nothing but love.

Love is not a feeling, not a thought, nothing given or got, not more or less. Not a precaution or warning, not a push or a prod. Not a reminder, not a teaching, not a performance. Love is not what I say and not what you hear. Not how was school how was the test what about homework what are you wearing wash your face eat your dinner pick up your shoes I don’t like her him that when if what did you do what did you say what about your terrible wonderful failure success happiness sadness what about me what about me what about me?

Love is the space between us. There is so much space.

What will you put into that space today, I ask myself before I hear the roar of my own echo.

Just shut up.

Reprinted with permission […]

Love Is More Than A Four-Letter Word

by Rosemary Lichtman Ph.D. and Phyllis Goldberg Ph.D.

Long before it was a song, the saying was a part of our conversation: Love makes the world go ’round.

With all this whirling, love can make you feel off balance and dizzy. Sometimes it’s tricky to keep your personal world turning without having it spin totally out of control. Although our focus is most often on romantic love, there are many different kinds of love that help keep us grounded. […]

My Love Will Not Let You Down

by Ellie Stoneley

At this time of year, when the tills of florists, card shops and chocolate emporia go “ker-ching,” the world is suddenly filled with red heart-shaped helium balloons, and I’ve often been known to become a little cynical.

I love ‘love’, and I love being told I’m loved and I love loving the people I love, but, and it is a big, but, I do struggle with the huge amount of money spent at Valentine’s Day on meals that are that bit more expensive than they usually are and, well, the whole thing really. I used to love the idea of anonymous Valentine’s cards and remember trying to disguise my writing in them at school or trying to decipher coded messages to see if I could work out who a card was from. I also know and do remember the bitter disappointment when no card arrived, or if the rose that did come wasn’t a huge bunch of them. (Yes, I was that shallow as a teenager … and constantly disappointed!!!) […]

Does Cupid Need Therapy?

by Marc Parsont

I’d like to offer apologies in advance to those of you who love Valentine’s Day and find my thoughts saccharine-religious. I don’t always spend my time thinking of things like this. Oh, no, it sometimes gets worse.

I wonder how old Cupid is and why he’s still wearing a Toga? Is he a party animal? Does he get drunk and stupid like we did when we were young and throw up on the floor? Who cleans it up? Do mother or father clean up after their little Cupid? (Midlife parents would do anything for their children, overlook any problem, for even terribly misbehaved ones like Cupid.) […]

10 Reasons I Love Myself

by Ann Sheybani

image courtesy of flickr.com

I love, love, love Gala Darling. Her site is all about radical self-love. My favorite among her posts: 100 Ways You Can Start Loving Yourself Right Now. In it she says:

“Make lists of reasons why you love yourself… & write down (or keep mental lists) of the compliments other people give you. We’re so quick to believe people when they say nasty, unkind or “brutally honest” (ahem, cruel) things to or about us, & we discard all the times we’re told how amazing, beautiful or intelligent we are. Usually this is because our sense of self-doubt is stronger than our self-love. If you can build up the love side of things, this will begin to change.” […]

Interview with Josie Iselin, Author of Heart Stones and Sea Glass Hearts

by Cyma Shapiro

Dear Reader: Heart Stones is my most favorite Valentine’s Day book, ever. I own and have given several of Josie’s books for presents. MitM is honored to feature her, for Valentine’s Day.

Q: Josie, your first book is called Loving Blind/Seeing Red: A Mother’s Decade. It features a series of images with connecting anecdotes about life with small kids which was inspired by your earliest path through motherhood. As the mother of three children, now ranging in age from 15 to 20, they appear to be your driving force, motivation and inspiration. Please tell me more about your journey with them and how it has contributed to your finding your life’s work.

I had my first baby (20 years ago nearly today in fact!) at midwinter break in the second of three years of an MFA program and when done, I thought I would be teaching pretty consistently. But teaching in the arts is initially a transient thing…The reality was that the best economic model for our family was for me to be home with the kids…and it was a gift to us as a family and to me as an artist. My studio is just downstairs (through the backyard) from the kitchen and my work and life are intertwined, physically as well as psychically. My kids and my husband always inspire me to do better work. […]

A Valentine’s Tradition

by Maggie Lamond Simone

Gather ’round, kids. Our very favorite holiday, Valentine’s Day, is fast approaching. It’s the one day we are allowed to blatantly display our love for each other, and every year Auntie Maggie takes particular delight in sharing the special story of this most romantic time. Yes, Auntie Maggie has an issue or two. […]

It’s My Birth Date And I’ll Lie If I Want To…

by Ramona Duoba

Image courtesy of wmphoenixopen.com

If turning 50 wasn’t bad enough I have a daughter who has taken a keen interest in my age. It’s probably because she doesn’t know how old I really am.

Being obsessed with aging or anti-aging is a way of life for many women, but has the obsession gone too far when you can’t be truthful with your own daughter? I suppose many people would say I’m setting her up, or that my inability to tell the truth about my age is an example of self-loathing or some deep-rooted trauma that I haven’t come to terms with. It’s not. I just don’t like aging. It’s that simple. There’s nothing wonderful about looking at a passport photo from 10 years ago and comparing it to the one I have today. There’s a harsh difference. […]