Some mothers will say that they first felt like a mother when they saw an ultrasound of their baby for the very first time, or the moment they heard the baby’s heart beat, maybe even felt the first kick or movement their baby made inside of them.
I love and cherish all those moments. But, the moment I truly felt like a mother came in the hospital, as I was about to give birth to our son….
Sixteen hours into labor, I finally succumbed to an epidural. I had a birthing plan and having an epidural was NOT on it! I had taken months of Hypno-Birthing classes and even had a Doula in the birthing room to help me follow my plan.
I breathed steadily and courageously without a scream or harsh word (very uncharacteristically of me) through hours of intense contractions until the moment came when there wasn’t a moment in-between the contractions.
What had happened?
I had been dealing with contractions because I had had a minute, or two or, even three, to breathe. But now, where did my minutes go?! I was beside myself. I couldn’t make a noise. This all was too intense. I strained to whisper to my husband, “Get me an epidural. Now.” (He had the audacity to ask me, “Are you sure?”)
And, after this…I wasn’t feeling any pain as chaos broke out into our little room – nurses rushing in and out – looking at the monitor and me, back at the monitor, back at me. My doctor’s brow furrowed as beads of perspiration rolled down his profile. A newfound feeling was about to overcome me; engulf my soul and change me forever.
I didn’t completely realize what was going on. I just figured that in my exhausted state that all of this is how it goes – so close to delivery. Unbeknownst to me at the time, the umbilical cord was wrapped around our son’s neck. As they were monitoring our little baby boy, they could see his heartbeat losing momentum. Then, they would quickly turn me over to my other side and see his heart beat pick up. This went on for some time – back and forth – turning me from side to side.
At one point, one of the nurses came toward me with a very determined voice and whispered, “You need to stay calm and breathe slowly – for your baby.”
This was the moment when I became a mom – for real.
In the midst of the commotion; in that moment of exhaustion and fear, I became a strong warrior-Mother. I remembered my ten years of yoga-breathing and instinctively slowed down my inhales and exhales. I closed my eyes and prayed to God to help us.
Forty-five minutes later, exhausted and drained, I pushed our slightly blue-hued son into the world.
I was shaking as I held him for the first time – with relief, exhaustion, and a mother’s love.
Theresa Turchin, 50, was raised in a small town in Connecticut with her older brother and sister. Her parents divorced when she was nine – the first family to do so in her small community. With gumption and a “do or die” attitude, she moved to NYC to model, with just $500 in her pocket. She wasn’t accepted by the first few agencies and finally found her home with Elite models in 1982. She traveled the world modeling in Paris, Milan, Tokyo, London, and beyond, and finally settled in Miami Beach where she met her husband (now of twenty one years).
They’ve had many adventures, like, traveling with their band, designing a clothing-line, and, finally, becoming parents. By far, her biggest blessing is their now six-year-old son, born (without hormones or IVF, but miraculously the old fashioned way) when she was two weeks shy of her 44th birthday. She and her husband are the owners of Turchin Love and Light Jewelry, women’s and men’s sterling silver and gold jewelry, created by the philosophy of Love & Compassion – their positive message…Love Is The Answer.