Mother's Day Archives - Mothering in the Middle

Happy Mother’s Day, Heidi – From Your Husband, Mr. Mom

by Marc Parsont

There are some parents, both male and female, who do not want to have children. I respect their wishes completely.

It is not easy being a parent. As a matter of fact, we know that there are lots of lousy parents out there – certainly a lot of clueless ones.

I remember when we (young newlyweds, albeit old newlyweds, too) visited my brother and his family in Tucson. Heidi and I could not believe that anyone could raise children like that and not wind up in either an institution or in jail.

The snide comments and “suggestions” we made didn’t seem to go over too well. I don’t know why? Could the fact that we didn’t yet have children and didn’t have a clue, be the reasons? […]

My Birthing Experience: When I Became A Mom – For Real

by Theresa Turchin

Some mothers will say that they first felt like a mother when they saw an ultrasound of their baby for the very first time, or the moment they heard the baby’s heart beat, maybe even felt the first kick or movement their baby made inside of them.

I love and cherish all those moments. But, the moment I truly felt like a mother came in the hospital, as I was about to give birth to our son…. […]

Haiku for Midlife Mothers – Happy Mother’s Day!

by Roxanne Jones

Dear Reader: Please enjoy some haikus from BoomerHaiku that celebrate the special challenges – and rewards – of midlife motherhood.

Japanese symbol for Mother

What’s Boomer Haiku? Well, a haiku is a 17-syllable poem in three lines of 5, 7 and 5 that traditionally evokes images of the natural world. Boomer Haiku (a blog by Roxanne Jones) takes a mostly light-hearted, often irreverent look at life as a baby boomer as we move through midlife and beyond. After all, what could be more natural than looking (and laughing) at our lives at this juncture?

Having a baby practically guarantees you never get enough sleep. Plus, you’re likely dealing with the sleeplessness that often accompanies perimenopause or menopause:

Sleep deprived. Whether
from hormones or new baby,
it’s my new normal. […]

Thanking Namea During Mother’s Day

by Jo-Ann Rogan

My first child did not arrive until I was close to my 38^th birthday, so I spent years thinking Mother’s Day was someone else’s holiday. I never imagined I would have children – it was a day where I just showed love to the Moms in my life, but it was never about me.

Then I had kids.

When they were little, my husband would help, but it still wasn’t about me because babies are needy little creatures, especially when they are nursing. Eventually, I could get my kids to do projects with me on Mother’s Day. (My husband cooks and I get the kids to help me plant a garden or do other household chores which will give us time together.) My Mother’s Day is usually nice.

For some women, Mother’s Day is agony. I personally watched friends suffer through the holiday after losing a parent, struggling with infertility, or having had a complicated relationship with their own mother. […]

The Mother’s Day Predicament for Stepmothers

Trisha Ladogna and Rachel Ruby

Modern-day Mother’s Day celebrations are an opportunity to pay tribute to our mothers and thank them for all their love and support. For stepfamilies, this day of appreciation of mothers and mother-figures can raise a whole lot of something – not all of it always good!

For many reasons, it can be difficult for children, even those with the most amicable of co-parents, to celebrate both their parents and stepparents on Mother’s/Father’s Day. Mother’s Day can highlight the most intractable problems between moms and stepmoms and leave children feeling like they are fighting the ‘Battle Royale’ of internal battles out in public for their whole world to see.

As a stepmother, being ignored by your stepchildren on Mother’s Day – well, it sucks. More so, if you have been in the picture for a long time and you do a lot of parent-like things for your stepchild. Putting yourself in your stepchild’s shoes and looking at the situation from their perspective might help take the sting out of being overlooked or ignored on Mother’s Day. While considering things from the child’s point of view, you might also find that their response towards you on Mother’s Day actually has little to do with you as a person or as a stepmom, but more about their own feelings and struggles. […]

Taking Back Mother’s Day

by Nancy LaMar-Rodgers

Nancy is the infant not yet in the photo

Ode to Mom

I am the youngest of eight children. I was born in 1963, a bygone era of large families and stay-at-home moms. My mother had eight children within 13 years with a few miscarriages thrown in for good pregnancy measure.

We are Irish Catholics with no sense of rhythm and therefore yearly pregnancies were the norm.

While I remember us celebrating Mother’s Day as adult children, I have no recollection of what that day looked like for her when we were all young. I know that Mothers Day existed, because Woodrow Wilson signed the proclamation in 1914 declaring it a day of honor for mothers. […]

Celebrate Your Mother-Colleagues This Mother’s Day

by Lori Mihalich-Levin

During the holiday season a few years ago, the chief of my division at work gave each of us a bottle of wine as an end-of-the-year thank you gift. Attached to the bottle was a typed note of the things she was grateful for, and at the top of the page was a handwritten, personalized note of gratitude.

To me, she wrote “Thank you for juggling work and motherhood so elegantly.” Elegence?! I was breathtaken. I was only a few months back from maternity leave after the birth of my second child, and that word was the antithesis of how I would have described myself.

Here I was, thinking I was frazzled beyond recognition, burning candles at both ends, wearing ponytails and quite possibly clothing that smelled like spit-up. And the word she chose was “elegantly”?! […]

Is Mother’s Day Just Another (Obligatory) Hallmark Holiday?

by Nicholas D'Ambra

I remember reading somewhere that a stay-at-home mom’s salary hangs somewhere around $112,000 a year. This includes overtime, which… lets’ face it…it should. The hourly average comes out at .25 below $18 per hour. Where we live, we pay a good sitter $15 per hour, so that hourly rate is, if anything, low (insert wide-eye emoticon here).

The two things we do not value enough in this country are stay-at-home parents (I’m including Dads here, because times have changed, people!) and teachers. It’s ironic, really, because as Americans, we want to be the best in all things and we value family so very much.

And if we value family so much, then why are moms… and dads who stay at home so under-valued/under-appreciated? […]

11 Days to a New Midlife Mother’s – Day (A Carol Sung to “The 12 Days of Christmas”)

by Cyma Shapiro

On the 30th day of April, Another said to me, “Good for You!”

On the first day of May, Another said to me, “What were you thinking?”

On the second day of May, Another said to me, “Why would you do this?”

On the third day of May, Another said to me, “When will you retire?”

On the fourth day of May, Another said to me, “Are you the Grandma?”

On the fifth day of May, Another said to me, “You’re how old?”

On the sixth day of May, Another said to me, “You are pretty selfish!”

On the seventh day of May, Another said to me, “Is this your first marriage?”

On the eighth day of May, Another said to me, “How did you do this?”

On the ninth day of May, Another said to me, “Who is the father?”

On the tenth day of May, Another said to me, “A lot of people are doing this.”

12 Days to Mother’s Day (A Carol Sung to “The 12 Days of Christmas”)

by Cyma Shapiro

On the 29th day of April, my mother said to me, “Why don’t you ever call home?”

On the 30th day of April, my mother said to me, “Look at me when I talk with you.”

On the first day of May, my mother said to me, “You need a bigger diamond.”

On the second day of May, my mother said to me, “Thanks for that tchatchke.”

On the third day of May, my Mother said to me, “Would you jump off the bridge if someone told you to?”

On the fourth day of May, my Mother said to me, “I wasn’t born yesterday.”

On the fifth day of May, my Mother said to me, “Wait until you have kids.”

On the sixth day of May, my Mother said to me, “When will you marry?”

On the seventh day of May, my Mother said to me, “When will I become a Grandma?”

On the eighth day of May, my Mother said to me, “Come sit on my lap.”

On the ninth day of May, my Mother said to me, “You’ll thank me when you get older.”

On the tenth day of May, My Mother said to me, “If only you knew what I know.”