Mothers Over 50

11 Days to a New Midlife Mother’s – Day (A Carol Sung to “The 12 Days of Christmas”)

Mothers

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

On the 30th day of April, Another said to me, “Good for You!”

On the first day of May, Another said to me, “What were you thinking?”

On the second day of May, Another said to me, “Why would you do this?”

On the third day of May, Another said to me, “When will you retire?”

On the fourth day of May, Another said to me, “Are you the Grandma?”

On the fifth day of May, Another said to me, “You’re how old?”

On the sixth day of May, Another said to me, “You are pretty selfish!”

On the seventh day of May, Another said to me, “Is this your first marriage?”

On the eighth day of May, Another said to me, “How did you do this?”

On the ninth day of May, Another said to me, “Who is the father?”

On the tenth day of May, Another said to me, “A lot of people are doing this.”

 

What, Me Worry? (A Commentary on the Recent East Side/NYC Apartment Building Explosion)

St Mark's PlaceMy son lives one avenue over from the East Village burned-out building, destroyed by a major gas leak explosion a few weeks ago.

He had been worried that it was a matter of time before areas of the city, particularly the Village, imploded. The infrastructure is just too old and jerry-rigged, he complained, as we munched on delicious Korean dumplings, hand rolled by Korean ladies standing behind the counter in front of us.

I have always worried about someone pushing him onto the subway tracks or his being mugged on a dark street at two a.m.-never imaging a gas explosion around the corner from his apartment, destroying an entire building and quarantining several neighboring ones. [Read More…]

My Mystical Journey to Midlife Motherhood

Laura and young daughterI have always felt there was a mystical path for my becoming a mother.   It took longer and was more challenging than I could have wanted or expected.  Through it all, I never doubted in my conviction that my destiny was to be a “mom.”

Life is a scavenger hunt and there are clues presented through following the vibration of the heart. Reason has nothing to do with Love.

Today, at 60, I am the proud mother of a young teenage daughter embarking on her future. I dislike labels, so I consider myself a late bloomer – not an “older mom.”

Yet, I also find myself in a tough place of introspection, realizing my years ahead will be less than the ones gone by in my “rear view mirror.”  For the last few years, I am no longer someone’s daughter – I said goodbye to that sweet role with the death of both my parents. [Read More…]

Daily Pearls of Wisdom

Lydia and Caroline 2011

I can hear my cell phone blowing up. First a text, then endless ringing until it goes to voicemail. Trying to work on my novel and tune out distractions, I kick myself for neglecting the first rule of writing: turn off all devices.

Then, the landline starts to ring and it doesn’t take caller ID to know it’s my daughter with the tragedy du jour. I pick up, knowing that she’ll keep trying until she has to resort to calling her father. God forbid. He’ll dispense real advice. Taboo in the parenting manual.

That’s my 26-year-old daughter, calling in for her daily dose of moral support or to simply “kvetch.” When her life is going well, it’s a joy to pick up, but when it’s not… well, that’s when I need to be on my A-game. [Read More…]

Rebirth (The Passage of Time and A Personal Take on Spring)

Funny old thing, time … One minute there you are with a newborn baby wondering over every minute, every detail of a new person, and then woosh – suddenly you have a three year old, grey roots in your hair and no idea where the last three years went.

In fact, it’s impossible to believe that your exuberant, fiesty, glorious small person was ever a tiny newborn, a baby crawling at the speed of lightning down the hall or a toddler wobbling along on chubby little legs, arms up in the air trying to balance.

Somehow in the wink of an eye your child has become an all-consuming, time-eating, high-speed and even more demanding individual with strong opinions on everything and an all encompassing zest for life (and love of sticks, mud and trampolines). [Read More…]

By |April 2nd, 2015|Categories: Commentary, Daily Living, Motherhood, Mothers Over 40, Mothers Over 50|Tags: , |0 Comments

Five Tips to Reconnect and Grow the Roots Deep (With Your Adult Children)

Peggy and daughter

As our children grow up, it can sometimes feel as if they’re growing away from us.  We know they need to spread their wings, find themselves, and cut the apron strings, but that doesn’t stop us from feeling a little sting the first time we realize they don’t want to be seen with us at the mall.

The separation process continues as they develop their own interests and pursuits, many times going in very different directions from the well-intentioned road map we carefully created for them.

The teen years blow in, bringing the discomfort of change we’re not ready for:  a sudden disinterest in family vacations, less time with family and more time with friends, and a dislike for shared activities that were enjoyable just yesterday.

[Read More…]

Nine Tips to Help Teach Kids to Love Themselves

heart balloonTeaching our kids how to love themselves is an ongoing task. It is a legacy that, when passed on correctly, will forever be an asset, much more than money or the best college!

You teach youngsters that to love themselves is to answer to their own hunger with food, to their own thirst with water and to their emotions with kindness and gentleness, no matter what they are. It is pretty straightforward.

When your kid becomes a teen, you teach him to love himself by not giving in to peer pressure. Withstanding peer pressure equals loving oneself.

You explain that not to have sex when too young or under-pressure is about self-respect and self-love. Depending on religious beliefs, you may say they need to wait until marriage, or not. [Read More…]

Love Thy Children, Love the World

Wendy Sue Noah's multiple family photosOh, that title sounds LOVE-ly, yes?!  But what do I really mean here, besides sharing my hippie (not religious) ‘love thy neighbor as yourself’ mentality?

As a single parent, with no romantic partner for over a decade, Valentine’s Day and the concept of love has taken on an entirely new shape for me – one that is ever more encompassing and one that does not leave me feeling incomplete or resentful for not having a partner to share it with.

It is the kind of love that keeps growing, expanding and revealing itself to me throughout my everyday life. [Read More…]

A Family Valentine’s Day

Melanie Elliott's family

I’m kind of one of those people who consider Valentine’s Day a Hallmark-created holiday.  Growing up, I tried not to buy into the importance of the day and the romantic notions that permeate this holiday.  I wasn’t quite successful.

There was a part of me that longed for the flowers and chocolates and the boyfriend who’d treat me like a queen on this special day.  But, that was only a part of me.  The other part of me didn’t want to be defined by whom I was with or how I was treated when February 14 rolled around.

[Read More…]

The Heart’s Memory Lives On

Lori Pelikan's V-Day card IOn my kitchen counter there sits a small basket. In the basket, there is a small, folded-up piece of notebook paper. I have kept this note for 36 years. It is yellowed and slightly torn at the corners, but I haven’t been able to throw it out. It has a very special Valentine’s Day message to me.

I remember the grade school days of giving Valentine’s Day cards to all of my classmates. My mother would drive me to the store and I would painstakingly pick out the perfect box of Valentine’s Day cards for my friends. After handing them out in class, I can clearly see myself breathlessly waiting to open the cards from my friends, especially the boys. Somehow my girlfriends and I could always figure out which boy liked us. [Read More…]

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